Oh sweet heavens! It’s been a while…
Those moments when you are running yourself ragged and God forces you to sit down and shut up! (I mean I believe in the fullness of God’s power, but, personally, I like to think He would speak a bit more gently than this…however, I couldn’t help but hearing Lieutenant Dan’s voice saying “Get down! Shut up! I mean Forrest listened to that, right?!) Anyway…this has been me lately.
So I have this job. Normally it’s a nice steady-paced, enjoyable occupation that allows me to go visit other offices to say hello from time to time throughout the week and take frequent snack breaks to find who still has Reese’s sitting on their desk. Lately…breathing and eating between 8 and 5 are questionable. Only a few more days of this craziness. Praise the Lord!
Yesterday as I was working and working and working…and working! And forgetting what I was doing in the middle of working because my brain is fried, I was struck by reality. A friend stopped by to tell me of an appointment that led to scary words like disease and specialists and things of the like. It definitely woke me up from my busy-ness.
Then today.
Baby sitter: Hey Brooke. Malachi has a fever.
Me: No! This is unacceptable today! No sickness is allowed until June 11th! I have too much to get done and despite staying up until 1…2 AM most days (obviously not working on actual work work, but taking part in all my time consuming late night hobbies…like quilting and tiling of course). I don’t have enough time for life!
Two days in a row God has simply made me sit down and shut up! Taking my thoughts off of this crazy work life and reminding me not to get caught up in the whirlwind.
I’ve been blessed to be able to travel overseas a few times. One of my favorite things about other countries is the pace of life. I’m sure this isn’t the case everywhere, but the places I’ve been…people were more concerned with people than they were with making money or working their life away.
I joke about that phrase some days. My dad calls and asks what I’m doing a few times a week…and 9 times out of 10 my response is “working my life away.” Obviously there is good in working and I enjoy it, but I simply try not to get sucked in to the rut of that coming before anything else.
I love how in the midst of the crazy times, God constantly gives me wake up calls. Brooke! Be still! Brooke seek me! Brooke does this really matter in the grand scheme of things?
- Psalm 46:10 – Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!
- Exodus 14:14 – The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent.
- Mark 4:39 – And He awoke and rebuked the wind and said to the seas, “Peace! Be still!” And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm.
- Psalm 62:5 – For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from him.
- Isaiah – And the effect of righteousness will be peace, and the result of righteousness, quietness and trust forever.
Sometimes I simply feel like I’m fighting against the normal-ness of this life. Trying so hard not to fall into the mold of “how are you?” “Oh gosh I’m so busy.” We choose that, right? Few people actually want to be busy, but our choices lead to that.
About a year ago I started cutting things out of my life. Good things! At the time it was hard for me to see it as good, but I’m convinced now that those negations in our life were fantastic decisions that Kyle and I made. Thank you Hads for not wanting to play soccer this year (she made that decision 100% on her own for anyone throwing stones that I drug her out of it) and simply letting me jump on the trampoline with you…play in the sandbox with you…and teach you that dropping potatoes on the floor while peeling them is okay! Thank you for being okay with not wanting to be a professional dancer and trusting me when I said we could wait one more year. I mean I may have won a dance-off with a random four-year old this week, but let’s be honest, me and that kiddo will most likely never make an appearance on Dancing with the Stars.
(Hi I’m Brooke. My agreeableness score on the Big 5 was about as high as they come. I avoid conflict at all costs so if you strongly believe having your child signed up in every sport known to man-kind is best for your family, then great! You do you! I’ll do me! 🙂 I mean…I am Type Smigilishinoo so I don’t do well with organized anything anyway! Maybe you’re kid can show mine her next dance routine like my kid-friend Rachel did!)
I see it over and over in the Bible. Stillness. Silence. Quiet.
Once I heard a friend say, “If Satan can’t keep you down, he’ll keep you busy.”
I just want to choose silence…to choose stillness. Running ragged is for the birds!