About two months ago I told my supervisor I was leaving my job (at the end of the semester). I had prayed and thought and prayed and thought about all the reasons I should or shouldn’t. At the end of the day there was only one thing keeping me from throwing in the towel.
Money.
I had NEVER wanted to be a stay-at-home mom, but I prayed a prayer that God would shake my life and weeks later all of these new desires started creeping in.
I started desiring to be home with my kids. Desiring freedom from the normal 8-5. Desiring sweatpants on my couch on snowy days (well that one wasn’t new). The flexibility to take my kids to the library whenever I wanted. The luxury of getting to plant myself by a pool at least 6 out of 7 days during the summer.
But…we realized doing this would cause a strain on us financially. My husband, of course, is not some lazy dude that sits on his butt. He works and works and works, but we were simply choosing to part ways with this stable two-income lifestyle and frolic off into Faith Field where the lilies are clothed in and the birds are fed (Matthew 6:26-29) and I’m believing His children are provided for.
After a ton of prayer, a ton of seeking wisdom from way smarter people than me, loads of thinking, and believing that God will do what God says He will do…we decided to do life differently. We have been very stable financially for years and we don’t live in complete abundance, but we definitely have more than we need. This decision came at a time when we were truly having to put our faith in God knowing that if we made this choice we would be watching God work in a whole new way. Watching how He takes less and creates more. Watching how He reminds me that my identity lies in Him, not in my job, not in my salary, not in my title!
I had started a little side gig doing photography about two months before all of this… expecting very little from it. (I have this way of thinking that if I keep my expectations really low, I won’t be disappointed as often. Ha. Maybe you shouldn’t take up my way of thinking.) Expecting this to be something that solely filled my desire for creativity and blessed people with some sweet memories to put on their walls.
Not even six months into venture and God has shown me how he can provide far beyond what I ever imagine. Taking this simple hobby of mine and blowing my mind with the ways He’s able to use it to lessen some of the strain.
This morning, my oldest child turned six. (How I am a mother to a 6 year old? I’m not sure as I still don’t admit that I’m old enough to have a child in school.) I couldn’t sleep last night because I was so excited about the forecasted snow (even though 98% of the time I don’t let meteorologists’ predictions get me excited. This morning I told Hads to look outside. With huge eyes, she said, “MOM!! It snowed just for my birthday!”
I simply believe that God cares for us in ways that are specific to each of us personally. Just as this kiddo believed the snow was falling for her birthday. I trust that God truly knows our hearts desires even more so than we do.
Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him and He will act. (Psalm 37:4-5)
Obviously, I’m not there yet. Thirty work days left before I am fully engulfed in my new lifestyle, but I am thrilled with the possibilities of the newness of how our lives will look, I am excited to see how God will consistently provide for His children, and I am encouraged and know that God is able to do abundantly more than all we ask or imagine (Ephesians 3:20).